Despite being very angry today, I hatched a plan. A plan to let me gain access to my confiscated phone and check for missed calls and text messages.
I allowed my angry parents to lose their emotions to the England match, as my mum cheered excitedly at the desperate attacks, and my dad made snide remarks about the constant back passing, I sat quietly on the chair by the sofa waiting for the right moment.
During a particularly tense moment in the game, my mother leaned forwards as iff being closer to the TV would help Englands chances of scoring. The jacket she was wearing hung lose by her side and I passed my hand over the outside pocket, and dipped in slightly. The strong magnet in my hand picked out the bedroom key, the thin cloth I wrapped around the magnet prevented any sound from alerting my mother to the tactical subversion.
I quickly pocketed the key and the magnet. At this point I was feeling extremely proud of myself, I struggled to contain the adrenaline fueled excitement I felt at achieving such spectacular under-handedness, basically, I felt apretty damned James Bond about it.
I waited for an appropriate moment to leave the room, Wayne Rooney being sent off was just perfect. I stepped out complaining under my breath about the referree, then slipped upstairs.
Unfortunately, the search of my parents bedroom yielded no results, I looked in all the hiding places and their was no sign of my phone. This got me annoyed, as now I had to go to the effort of returning the key unnoticed, and finish my "mission" with no results.
Instead of trying to return the key into the jacket pocket, I slipped into a gap between the cusions on the sofa behind my mum whilst she was leaning forwards. Later she'll fail to find it in her pocket and assume it went down the back of the sofa, which it had 
Captain Petee's New World
